Letting Life Happen

I’m writing this from seat 9B on a flight from Milwaukee to Minneapolis, heading home with Bill after a 26-hour whirlwind mini-vacation. The trip was chock full of opportunities to “receive.” And let me tell you, it was quite a valuable lesson.

We’ve all heard the mantra: “It’s better to give than to receive.” Like most others, I always bought into that concept, too, until my ideas around it were challenged, causing me to think completely differently.

Yes, giving is wonderful! And it’s what makes the world go ‘round. However…

I just finished the book The Go-Giverby Bob Burg and John David Mann. If your life or business involves giving to others (which I hope it does!), then this book is a must-read. In the book, one of the Laws of Success is “The Law of Receptivity.” Its tagline: “The key to effective giving is to stay open to receiving.”

When I first saw that, I thought, “Huh?” But now I get it and Read more »

I tend to pay attention when themes come up in my coaching sessions with clients. Most recently there have been several conversations around the “masks” we wear.

For example, you might wear a certain mask when you’re with family—not letting them know how you really prefer to raise your children. Or you might wear a mask with friends for fear of them learning how overwhelmed you really are with life. And the one I deal with most often—the mask you wear in the workplace. This one allows you to play the game, live up to (perceived) expectations, and most importantly—not let anyone see who you really are.

In my coaching, the masks that clients talk about are pretty big and definitely get in their way of fully being who they are.

Posing as someone else takes work

It takes a lot of energy to wear a mask; to be someone you’re not. One of my clients felt compelled to put on her mask every time she walked through the door of her large organization. She revealed to me that she worked hard every day to keep Read more »

Have you ever seen Magen’s Bay in St. Thomas? What a fabulous place to leave behind any stresses, any “should’s,” any worries; and breathe in…life.

Similar to how a dog feels safe in his cozy kennel, as a beach bum I felt totally “safe” here on Magen’s Bay, too. The beach is surrounded by a cove; a magnificent three-sided wall of lush tropical green. There’s something about it that felt so comforting, and I was amazed by the acoustics—while there were hundreds of people having a good time on the beach, I noticed that we lowered our voices when we spoke, as if we were in a sacred space like a church or place of worship.

I was moved to take the above shot of a carefree grandma resting with her grandchild under the sun. Seeing the peace that enveloped these two reminded me of how easy it is to be “on-the-go” or to be busy “gettin’ stuff done.” It’s certainly not as easy to tap into the joy of life amidst that busy-ness.

On the contrary, joy is wonderfully experienced when we slow down, take a deep breath, and relax into being.

You may have heard the notion that Read more »

Following your joy. It’s important to know what it is, specifically, that brings you joy…and then make sure to get more that in your life.

I’d also like to add another point of view–it was John Lennon who said: “Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans.” So true. We can spend so much time and energy meticulously planning and plotting out our days and our lives. And at the same time, we’ve got to be open to whatever might come our way. It may even be something that we’ve never dreamed of!

You really don’t want to miss those amazing little miracles that show up right in front of your eyes, especially when you’re somewhere else trying to plan for them or “make” them happen. You gotta be ready to catch them when they appear.

I’m really good at making a plan. In fact, I’d like to say that I excel at it. I’m learning, though, that there’s more—so much more—to life than “the plan.” And what I continuously remind myself of is to stay in the moment and Read more »

Often we learn best when we see ourselves reflected in the eyes of another. It might be through a family member, a best friend, or even through a miracle in nature. And so, a few summers ago I had the privilege of hosting a very special guest in our home to teach me a few things about life: a monarch chrysalis.

Previously, my dad watched this creation from the very beginning as a tiny pin-prick of an egg on a milkweed plant in his garden. From there, a tiny caterpillar hatched, grew into a big caterpillar, and then created a special cocoon for itself where the magic began to weave.

Upon my dad’s urging, Bill and I stopped over and picked up this beautiful chrysalis, hanging from a branch, and took it home to nurture until it was ready to leave. Our new houseguest was a brilliant green cocoon with perfectly arranged dots of gold decoration. This was our first experience with a chrysalis and we weren’t quite sure what to expect. So we watched. And we waited. We heard that, apparently, a large butterfly was supposed to come out of that small green chrysalis!

You probably know how the story goes—a week later, a monarch butterfly emerged and flew away. In the final days and hours before this monumentous event, though, my Read more »